6. Hide the matches 27 May, 2025 - 56 days

dude update and I'm gathering my matches.

As expected, most of the accessibility modifications for the dude were denied.

They denied most of the bathroom modifications, so he can't keep himself clean or even be assisted in that effort by me. Gross/TMI but he can't clean his bum. We had a bidet toilet seat that allowed him to be independent with all aspects of his toileting. This was approved before (8 years ago) but despite his worsening condition/mobility, it's somehow deemed not necessary now. I guess feces caked up on a human is no cause for concern. I guess allowing him the dignity of independence (aka me not wiping his bum) is just a luxury too far.

They also denied the roll up sink. I guess being able to wash hands and brush teeth is not a luxury a disabled person should expect. I guess leaning across a walker that keeps him from being able to fully engage the faucet and sink is acceptable.

They denied an accessible shower. Like what in the actual fuck?

Our options are as follows:

• Continue making him (and us) struggle/have skin issues from not being able to clean himself/the indignity of me having to wipe his bum/brushing his teeth/washing his hands/being able to shower while we engage in a lengthy appeals process

  
  

• Hope literally anyone will donate about $20,000 to the cause

  
  

• Try to find a pro bono attorney willing to fight for us

  
  

• Find out where these fuckers live and tell them they can assist him in his hygiene or better yet, make their home inaccessible for them so they can see what it feels like

I expected this. But I am beyond angry. This is what Medicaid cuts/managed care look like. And my son is paying the price.

Oh, and bonus, despite me changing our address MONTHS AGO and despite the address being on the quotes and on literally all of the documentation, they sent the letter to our old address and it's now "lost." This cuts into our time to appeal. I only know about the denial because his case manager called me.

Edited to add: because this request was considered "complex", it went to the MCO (Partners Health) medical review board. People with medical licenses denied these MEDICALLY NECESSARY items.